Bringing Fire Back To The Bedroom


When we talk about bringing the fire back to the bedroom, what exactly do we mean? Many believe this is a no brainer.  Everybody seeks pleasure!

Conveniently enough, one of the most common pleasures of life we know is sex. Yeah sex! It is a true part of who we are, physically and psychologically. If you are trying to bring the fire back into the bedroom, that shows that at one point – your bedroom was ablaze!  Somehow, someway that fire got put out and you are having a hard time getting it to light again.  There could be a number of things that can take the responsibility of killing the intimacy vibes: kids, busy schedule or lack of enthusiasm (just to name a few).  Here a few tips that may help “bring that fire back!”

Having Kids

So many wish to believe that everything will stay the same once kids enter the picture.  I hate to break it to you but it doesn’t!  For one reason or another, things will change (either you are so tired because the little person refuses to sleep, he or she times his or her cries perfectly to any intimate moments, or you are so stressed – sex is the furthest thing from your mind). Now, can we speak for every parent on the planet.  No!  I am sure there are exceptions (as there are to every rule) and kudos to you if you are one; however, if you are – you wouldn’t be reading this post.

Adding kids to the equation does not have to kill your sex life; however, it does provide the opportunity to have a conversation about it.  Talk to each other and come up with a plan where you can both benefit.  Maybe sex waits until the weekends where there are more chances of nap time and less changes of being exhausted from work.  Create date nights/intimacy nights were you are able to connect – even just for a few minutes.  Come to an understanding that this will not be forever.  Yes, the first six months may be hard but after little Suzy or Edward turn a year old, it won’t hurt them to spend a day with Grandma or at daycare so the two of you can reconnect (preferably in a number of different areas of the house!)

Busy Schedules

Put it on the calendar.  Don’t laugh – some of us literally have to do that! We start our day with our minds on work, go to work, end our day with our minds on what we never finished as work, and go to sleep.  It sounds quite simple just to turn off that way of thinking but come on – who are we kidding!  Add kids into this equation and now your sex life is competing with work tasks, activity schedules, school projects, etc.

With other commitments we attach ourselves to, it becomes increasingly difficult to find time for sex and easier just to table it for later. There is always time for everything  – maybe not at that moment or at that second, but there is always time.  Again, have a conversation and promise to have “no work” days or “kid free” days to allow the two of you to reconnect.  You can both take a day off (if you job allows it) and have a Couple’s day doing something you both truly enjoy.  Again, reigniting the fire doesn’t always have involve sex – sex does not equal intimacy.  You have to crawl before you walk.  Bring the intimacy back first and the sex will follow.

Lack of Enthusiasm

Yes, one of the most common killers.  Lack of enthusiasm, laziness, detachment  – you name it. You just don’t feel like it.  It is too much effort (any of this starting to sound familiar?)  You may have all the free time in world but the spark just isn’t there. The culprit for this is normally redundancy, boredom (in the relationship – not in the bedroom), or a disconnect due to a disagreement, fight, or argument.

In these cases, the need to reconnect as a couple outweighs the need to reconnect sexually.  Communicate, share, be open and honest, let each other know what you need for one another.  That conversation alone may be the foreplay you need to get thing started again!

About Wicked Butterfly

At the Wicked Butterfly, our goal is to intrigue, entice, seduce, and conquer the needs and wants of our clients. From Lingerie to Adult - we cover every base needed to guarantee a home run evening! We carry thousands of items in our store and are constantly adding to our collection. Browse our catalog, visit us on the web, like us, follow us, share us - we don't mind. We hope to always be your "go to" for any and all desires imagined.

Posted on June 22, 2016, in Relationship Tips and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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