Best and Worst Dating Tips
Posted by Wicked Butterfly
Everyone has dating advice to give you (whether you ask for it or not!) Your mother tells you to only date someone that has a college degree, your father says, “Make sure he can change a tire or he isn’t a real man!” Your best friend tells you to avoid a man with kids while your sister says you should give everyone a chance. Aahh! What is a person to do when they decide to dive into the dating scene?
We have decided to take a moment and scour the internet searching for some of the best (and worst dating tips).
Best Dating Tips:
1) Avoid oversharing! He doesn’t need to know that you prefer to shave your legs in the sink instead of the shower. She doesn’t need to know what you read on the toilet this morning. Leave out the exes, steer clear of the fact that your mother keeps asking when she is going to have grandbabies, and keep the conversation light. Yes, as you get to know each other – the conversations can go deeper but feel a connection before you start having the heart to heart talks or you will be having them by yourself.
2) Ladies, offer to pay! Gone are the days of the unsaid expectation that he will pick up the tab. Nowadays, he may not immediately go for the check. If he doesn’t, assume you are going Dutch or offer to pay. In most cases, he will decline the offer. In that case, offer to leave the tip! It speaks volumes to your character and how you perceive the person you are with at the time (are you just looking for a free meal, did you expect him to pay, or are you happy to just be with him.)
3) Let the other person speak! A dialogue is between two people; a monologue is just one person talking. No one wants to sit through a soliloquy – involve the other person in the conversation. Ask questions, show interest, and provide feedback. Keep your responses short and accurate (avoid a desultory conversation – the person will lose interest just trying to keep up.) In other words, shut up once in a while and let the other person speak! Listening is one of the most attractive qualities you can present to a potential partner.
4) Steer clear of outside opinions until you know how you feel about the person. We all want to show off our new interest. It is exciting, it is fresh, why wouldn’t we want to brag. The problem is when we do this, we allow the opinions of others cloud ours. Are we saying never ask for people’s opinions – no, of course not. Others may see what you do not; however, if you just started dating someone and they mention the size of someone’s nose (something you never noticed or cared about); suddenly, that is all you can see on your next date. Yes, that example is trivial but if we start to let others pick them apart before we get to know the whole person, we may be missing out on an opportunity of a lifetime.
5) Relax! He hasn’t called, she hasn’t texted, there hasn’t been anything since the date. Stop worrying about it. Ask yourself, would you really want to be with someone that doesn’t know how to communicate? If they didn’t have the decency to tell you they weren’t interested, move on. If they are interested but would rather play games than keep the communication open, again – move on! Save yourself the trouble and find someone that can make the time to pick up the phone and call (or text) just to say hi!
Worst Dating Tips:
1) Wait to call back. Stop this. Stop this right now! We are too old for games (I don’t care if you are 16 – if you are old enough to date, you are too old to play games). You wait three days to call, he or she may not answer! If you are interested in the person, why would you want to hide it? To play hard to get? Really? Let me ask you – how easy was it to get that first date? Why would you want to do that work again for the second? If they are on your mind, text them to say you had a great time. If you want to see them again, call them and let them know. If a person truly tells you he or she is not interested because you called before 3 days, do you really want to be with that person?
2) Be an a-hole/Playing hard to get. Ok (rubbing my forehead and taking a deep breath before I begin). This person asked you out because they liked something about you. If it was an online profile, they liked your profile and what you had to say. If they met you in person, they adored your personality. So why…why ON EARTH would you be a total douchebag on a date! Ladies – if he asked you out because you were being a complete b**** on your profile – fine – be one in person. Same for the guys; however, if you were the most wonderful person on your profile (or when the two of you met) – again, why would you be any different during the date! Stop pretending to be someone you are not because you think it will make you look cooler or be more appealing! Guys, if she wanted a bad boy – she would have dated a bad boy so unless you plan on keep up the rouge the entire time – don’t even start it. If that is not who you truly are, you are probably not going to like the type of woman who finds that a turn-on. Ladies – same goes for you. If you aren’t truly a b**** at heart, don’t start being one today. Do you really want to be with a guy who finds cattiness and nastiness sexy? What happens when you don’t feel like keeping up the charade?
3) Be yourself. Let me explain this one. When we say be yourself, we mean – be the best version of you that you can be. We all have good days and bad days. Would you really want a new interest to meet you on your worst date? That would make a fantastic first impression (insert sarcastic eye roll). When you go in for a job interview, do you show up in a pair of slippers and your pajamas or are you wearing your “interview outfit”? A nice suit, a lovely dress, whatever you prefer to wear when you are trying to WOW someone. You walk into the interview with pose, confidence, and you know what you are going to say when asked certain questions. Bring THAT to person to your first date. Be that person. You are still being yourself but you are being your best self.
4) Arrive fashionably late. No one likes their time wasted. This is just plain rude. If you make plans to meet for dinner at 8pm – get there at 8pm, heck – get there at 7:45 to make sure you can find parking and just wait until 5 minutes till to go in. It doesn’t make you look eager or desperate, it makes you look courteous and polite. Can you imagine someone showing up an hour late because they wanted to “make an entrance”? At that point, you are hungry, irritated, embarrassed (mainly because you have been swearing to the server for the past 60 minutes that someone was showing up as they kept bringing water, breadsticks, and asking if you want to order.) In the age of cell phones, if there is truly an emergency – call or text! If you haven’t exchanged numbers, call the restaurant and leave a message for the person. If there isn’t an emergency and every reply to their text is “I’m on my way” and that person is still there when you arrive – he or she is a keeper (because they have the patience of a Saint!)
5) Hide that you have kids. Please don’t do this. We aren’t saying bring your children on the date with you (that would just be weird!) We are saying if you have kids, let the person know during the first date so they don’t fall in love and start planning your future together only to be surprised later. Yes, many dating profile experts tell people to not post pictures of their kids all over the place and we agree (especially for safety purposes) but it should still be mentioned at least once that you are a mother or father and the number of children. Why? Some single dads (or men without kids) don’t have a problem dating a woman with 1-2 kids but 4 is out of the question. Same for women. I have actually known single moms who refuse to date men with kids! Either way, don’t lead someone on to drop a bomb like that in the future – children are a huge deal. You are asking someone to not only date you, but your children and to be flexible as you will not always be readily available like someone who doesn’t have that type of responsibility. For some, that is a deal breaker.
As you can see, everyone has an opinion and while we picked some of the best, you may have liked some of the worst. Either way, we just say keep an open mind and date with your best interest at heart. For us single ladies, we know it isn’t fun but with the right equipment, it can be a nice swim in a sea of possibilities.
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Posted on June 3, 2016, in Dating Tips and tagged adult toys, arriving late, bad boys, be yourself, brand name, calling, couples, customer picks, dating, dating rules, Dating Tips, favorites, hiding kids, highlights, intimacy, kids, lingerie, low prices, married, men, oversharing, paying, product highlights, recommendations, relationship, Relationship Tips, relax, rules of dating, single, texting, waiting 3 days, women. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.